Tension filled the air. I recognized the feeling that something important was about to happen. My shoulders tensed and I kept my hands fisted in my lap. I sat in an uncomfortable chair, my eyes wide, my heart pounding. Why had I agreed to this? I never was one for stress, nor did I handle it well. I wondered if I should have stayed home.
What should I expect? Would we get along? Oh, I knew I was meeting someone of the male persuasion for the first time, but I had no idea about those things most people want to know: how tall he'd be, how much he'd weigh, what color hair...did he even have hair? Images of me being swept off my feet boomeranged through my mind, and I imagined I’d have quite a story to tell. Besides, I’d discover the answers to all those burning questions I’d be asked.
Time ticked by. I probably could have left several times, but I really didn’t want to. In my mind, today was a special day and I was so ready for it...at least I thought. Before long, a nicely dressed man entered the room. He was quite handsome, I thought, and my heart fluttered when he signaled for me to join him.
"Stand right here," he said, and moved closer to the only other woman in the room. I wasn't sure what to expect, but I followed his instructions and stood, my legs wobbly, my hands shaking. I guess I was expected to do something since I showed up.
It didn't take long before I knew I'd made the right choice. I was so glad I came. The doctor turned from my daughter-in-law's side and placed my new grandson in my arms. "Here you go, grandma."
Turning pinker by the moment, the baby didn't cry, he didn't fuss, instead Spencer's gaze searched my face despite the overhead hospital light shining in his dark eyes, making them look like ebony gems. Although they say newborns don't smile, I swear his tiny lips curled as if to say, “I'm here, and I know you'll love me so much your heart'll hurt.”
You know what? He was right? The minute I first saw him my love blossomed and it's grown stronger every day since that moment twelve years ago. My Spencer! My Love! And the fact that he’s been diagnosed with Autism just makes me love him more and I praise God for the moment I met my grandson. That moment will always be a cherished memory.
Ginger Simpson moved to Tennessee in 2004 to be closer to her autistic grandson. Years of listening to Thomas and Train and Barney have now passed and are replaced with tales of Karate and Spencer's experiences in school. Ginger is now able to write while listening to more inspiring music, and although born and bred in California, she's adapted to southern hospitality, and saying ya'll. Among her many releases, Shortcomings, is a young adult novel which delivers a message she hopes may be helpful to her grandson and other children who are different from their peers.
Oh! This is so beautiful. Made me cry. It's absolutely true about our beloved grandchildren.ReplyDelete
I felt like I was the last person to hold my daughter. Because of the emergency c-section, I was numb from the neck down. My c-section was planned for my son. I got to hold him within minutes of being born. Then they took him away while the sewed me up.ReplyDelete
I remember those moments of holding my grandchildren for the first time. There's no other feeling to compare. Great story, Ginger.ReplyDelete